Avoid Dating Disasters After Divorce: 3 Light Bulb Questions You Have to Ask Him To Proceed Safely by Tony Edwards
So, you just met an awesome guy and you are excited about the future possibilities. But wait, did you say he is recently divorced? Well, that is cool. I mean these days, who is not…right?
There are so many divorced people in the dating scene that of course you are going to be bumping into many of them. You may even be divorced yourself. That is why you have got to get smart about dating after divorce, because it is not at all the same as dating when you have never been married.
In fact, it could be even better than dating before you were married because you have learned a lot about what works and what does not when it comes to love. The real question is has this divorced guy you have just met also learned those love lessons?
If he has not, he may not be ready to sail off into the sunset with a second chance at true love. He may need to go back to kindergarten, and you do not need to repeat that grade. To assess whether someone who is dating after divorce is really ready to move forward and forge a great new partnership, you have got to become a savvy sleuth.
Thankfully, that is easy enough. You have just got to know the right questions to ask. When you get good answers, all lights will turn green which means smooth sailing ahead!
If the answers leave something to be desired, use that red light to pause and consider taking a different direction to finding new love.
“3 Light Bulb Questions” to ask a newly divorced man:
1. What caused his marriage to break down?
It does not really matter what the real reasons were. The most important thing is whom he blames. If he is still pointing fingers, that is a big fat red light. Because every enlightened person knows that relationship problems are always the result of the interaction between BOTH parties. A marriage cannot die on its own. Your partner needs to help.
Your date needs to be able to identify how “he” contributed to the relationship’s demise. If he cannot, you do not want to date him.
2. What could he have done to create a different outcome?
Your date should be able to tell you what “he” could have done to change the pattern. For bonus points, see if he can tell you why he did not try it at the time. If he does not have some useful ideas, he is lacking insight and is likely to make the same old mistakes.
3. What will he do differently now?
Seeing how you contributed to the problems is one thing, but actually making changes so it does not happen again is another. How has he changed? How will he act differently in the future? If he has not worked on being a better person, chances are the old patterns will stay in place.
If you take the time to ask the “3 Light Bulb Questions” over a period of several dates, you will gather critical information to help you avoid dating disasters after divorce. Remember, better safe than sorry. If something does not feel right in your gut, take a pass on this person and save yourself for someone who is ready to create a deep, lasting bond.
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Article Source: Articles For Fun