Is It Time For You To Propose? by Art Gib
So, you two get along beautifully together. She makes you want to be a better man. At the end of a stressful day, you see her and suddenly everything is better.
Sometimes you find yourself perusing jewelry stores at your local shopping mall. But is it really time to take this crucial step? And how you do you make this moment the greatest of both of your lives so far?
First of all, even if you are in the completely elated romance phase right now, you have to make efforts to be practical and grounded. Be honest about the potential problems that exist in your relationship and how they could be damaging in the long run.
Things like out-of-control spending or ongoing deception–on her part OR yours–need to be addressed before you enter into marital bliss otherwise that bliss could be quickly destroyed by fighting, lies, and unnecessary stress. Pre-marital counseling is generally a good idea, even for a normal, healthy relationship, just to clarify expectations and ease anxieties.
Consider the future in realistic terms. What kind of goals do you and your significant other have? Do your paths seem to diverge at a certain point in your visions for yourself, or can you find ways to mesh your dreams to create a new vision for a life together which encompasses the things you truly want?
Be sure that you agree on the “big stuff.” For example, if you have this perfected idea of having four children, but your potential spouse insists she never wants kids, then try to work this issue out. If you can’t, you should walk away. Don’t convince yourself she will change her mind because she loves you–that isn’t fair.
Once you have taken steps to iron out some of the more practical affairs, then you can turn toward planning the proposal. Many couples these days prefer to have their fiancees select the ring before the big day, but for some big romantics, this spoils the event.
If you decide to go the surprise route, you should try to do some healthy snooping. Try to discreetly check with friends and family members to find out the engagement ring styles she might prefer.
For more personalized service and design, I highly recommend choosing a jeweler that is specific to your region. Commercial jewelers have a tendency to have higher overhead costs, which in turn amps up the cost of all engagement rings and wedding bands.
Take the time to plan it out and make it special to her. Chances are that if she is enamored of you as much as you are of her, then virtually anything you do will be thrilling. But still–if you truly consider what will be most memorable to her, she will be gushing about it for decades.
The Tiny Jewel Box (http://www.tinyjewelbox.com/) is a DC engagement rings. Art Gib is a freelance writer.
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